Listen

When Joseph’s brothers realized that their father was now dead, they said, “What if Joseph bears a grudge against us, and wants to pay us back seriously for all of the terrible things we did to him?” So they approached Joseph and said, “Your father gave orders before he died, telling us, ‘This is what you should say to Joseph. “Please, forgive your brothers’ sins and misdeeds, for they did terrible things to you. Now, please forgive the sins of the servants of your father’s God.”’” Joseph wept when they spoke to him.

His brothers wept too, fell down in front of him, and said, “We’re here as your slaves.”

Genesis 50:15-18

Think

Have you ever found yourself anticipating the way someone will respond? Maybe, like Joseph’s brothers, it’s how someone responds to an apology. Or maybe, it’s how they respond to sharing how you really feel or telling an uncomfortable truth.

We often anticipate in order to protect ourselves; we want to know what to expect. Joseph’s brothers anticipate that he will respond to them with retribution and punishment for the way they treated him. The brothers judge Joseph’s response before they even apologize, before they make amends, and their fear keeps them from offering a genuine apology. Instead they fabricate orders from their father that he forgive them. In judging how Joseph would respond, they miss the opportunity to make genuine amends.

The fear of how someone might respond or act can come from a place of judgment; of thinking we know how they will respond. Letting go of that expectation can be hard, but it may lead us to a place of deeper vulnerability, connection, and reconciliation.

Nick Carson

Question to Ponder:

What expectations are weighing on you right now?

Pray

God, help me to be honest, to apologize, to tell the truth.

Help me let go of the judgments I make of others.

Help me to say what is hard.

Amen.

Go

Give thanks for here. For now. For you. Amen.